The Bad Mom


I'm a bad mom. Seriously. I'm just selfish, and impatient, and not very understanding... I'm all the things that a good mom isn't. I love Henry so so so so so much, but I feel like I have completely lost my own life. I feel like I am here now simply to be Henry's mom - forget about anything Sarah may have needed or wanted. I know that saying these things makes me an even worse mom than I already am, but I need to be honest here... I talk to other women who tell me that having children made them feel complete and whole - and all I can think is that their lives must have been pretty boring before because I kinda miss my childless life sometimes. Now that Henry is here, I love him so much and can't wait to see his smiling face peeking over the crib rail every morning when he wakes up. He is so fun to play with, and really is a good, happy kid. I just need a break every once in a while. I need to be able to work out and take a long, hot shower without worrying if he'll wake up from his nap before I'm finished. I need to spend some stress-free time ALONE with my husband. A babysitter adds $50 or $60 to a night out, so we just don't do it that often. I need more support - a grandma that lives close by so Henry can spend a weekend with her every once in a while, and give us a much-needed break.
I know this all sounds terrible, but it is just honest. I think a lot of moms feel this way, they are just too embarrassed to say it out loud. Parenthood has its amazing, fun days, and its stressful, full of tears days... Which kind of day will tomorrow be???
Thanks for listening to the vent,
Denver's Worst Mom

Comments

  1. You are HORRIBLE ! No, almost every mom feels this way, minus the crazy few we wouldn't be friends with anyway! Of course I miss the random nights out, dinner without a kid throwing food across the restaurant, etc. I think that is the true essence of being a mom, balancing all that with the love you have for you kid. Time alone is not selfish, it should be mandatory!

    And HELLO, stop complaining about the babysitter! You know I would watch Henry fee free! Do you not trust me Sarah?! ;) Seriously though, have a date downtown and drop the kiddo off here! THere are some YUMMY places in lodo! And, if you get wasted, take a cab home and pick Henry up in the morning!

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  2. Of course I trust you, Holly!!! I just feel bad asking friends to watch Henry. But, one of these days before your baby #2 arrives, I may have to take you up on your offer...
    The mother-in-law is arriving today and will be here for a week, so we'll have a couple of opportunities to get out of the house together.
    Try to have a good alcohol-free New Years Eve tonight!!

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