The sick (possibly even dying) husband

He has a cold.

I know, it's just awful. Poor thing. He can't even breathe through his nose right now. I hate that.


There is one tiny, little, itsy-bitsy problem though...

Why is it that when Mommy gets sick she is still expected to be a productive member of the family, but when Daddy gets sick... out...clear the couch, because Daddy is about to lay there for the rest of the day moaning and groaning in agony over his terrible sore throat and congestion...
Men are such babies when it comes to getting sick.

Here's how this AM played out in our house:

ME (out loud): Hey babe, could you get Henry up while I make his breakfast? I'm running late for class.

SICKO (in a very sick-sounding voice): Oh, I don't think I should even touch him right now. I don't want him getting this cold.

ME (thinking to myself): Ummm....okay. Not quite sure what you're going to do all morning while I'm in class, then... Kinda thinkin' you may need to touch Henry once or twice...??

ME (out loud): Okay, I'll get him.

I'm finally able to leave the house, but didn't have time to clean up some of our breakfast - I left the strawberries and blueberries on the kitchen counter, sure that Sicko would put them away by the time I got home at noon.

Fast forward to NOON....

I walk through the door into the kitchen and what is the first thing I see? You guessed it - strawberries and blueberries sitting on the kitchen counter, plus a sink-load of dirty breakfast and lunch dishes and an overflowing trash can.

ME (thinking to myself): UGH. For real? You're SO sick that you couldn't even clean up after yourself?

ME (out loud): HI HENRY!!! HI JACK!! Mommy's sooooo glad to see you!! Oh, hey babe. How are you feeling?

SICKO (in slightly less sick-sounding voice): Terrible. My throat hurts so bad and I really can't breathe out of my nose.

ME (out loud): I'm sorry, babe. That sucks. Well, I'm going to eat lunch and then I'll clean up the kitchen and take the trash out. You go ahead and lay back down and rest. How was Henry this morning?

SICKO: He was good. I can't smell though, so I didn't know he pooped and now he has diaper rash. I put a lot of Desitin on it, though.

ME (thinking to myself): For real? You've been laying your ass on the couch all morning while the kitchen was a mess, the trash was overflowing AND our son was sitting in his own poop. Great.

ME (out loud): Oh, bummer. I'll keep an eye on it for the rest of the day. Hey - don't forget I have Mom's Night Out tonight at 6pm. I hate to go while you're sick, but I already paid for it and can't cancel now.

SICKO: Great.

ME (out loud): I'm sorry!

SICKO: It's okay. I just really don't feel good.

ME (out loud): Well, maybe we should take you to the emergency room. With all of this crying, you sound like you're about to die or something.

SICKO: Gee, thanks for your compassion.

Yeah...... So, I'm a mean, compassion-less wife with a really miserably sick husband.

Poor guy.

On a lighter note, Mom's Night Out was a blast! We went to Fancy Tiger and made cute little owl ornaments! Here's the one I made:

My good mommy-friend, Erica, actually did Henry's name. Thanks, Erica! It was a fun Mom's Night Out and wine wasn't even involved! I know, weird....

Well, I guess I should be a good wife and get off of this computer to go take care of my ailing husband.


  1. Hilarious! Matthew was sick a week ago and he actually used the word debilitating to describe his cold. Pathetic! I told him debilitating was probably better suited for a chronic illness or losing a limb:)

  2. Haha! It's oh so true... pretty sure I wrote a blog post just like that not so long ago! here's hoping he feels better really, really soon!!

  3. That's the Bubbs I remember! Too much nasal spray! I take it he's off the 'book and on to better things. Now I have to look elsewhere for daily words of wisdom! Hope you have a great new year! R. Parrish winkwink!

  4. You may try Nin Jiom Pei Pa Koa ( i know alot of people use it, its also non alcoholic, though it's effectiveness is not as good as alcohol based cough medicine, but it's still good to use on not so serious scratchy throat.

    apprently ( according to the instruction) children from 2 to 12 can use it.


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